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Why is My Boyfriend Acting the Way He is - 5 Insights

If you really think your boyfriend is right for you but you are always asking yourself, “Why is my boyfriend acting the way he is,” you need to find out the truth about why he does what he does. For example, you need to find ways to get some space for yourself, figure out how to interact with him in a way that preserves your own sanity, and at the same time helps rekindle his love for you.

Learning how to do this is not hard, but it does take some careful planning in order to get the results you are after. Here are 5 insights into how to figure him out and get what you need out of your relationship:

1 - Even though doing so may go against every fiber of your being, if your boyfriend is really acting up it is probably wise to distance yourself from him for a while. Try toning down the frequency and depth of communication between the two of you for a while. This is not going to be easy - and you will likely resist doing this on many levels. Still, a bit of time apart could make him realize how much he really cares about you. This first step is one of the most important parts of your plan.

2 - Give yourself some time to feel better about yourself. You need to find your balance and remember your own true self - who you really are. To regain his interest and get him to stop acting inappropriately, you first need to be grounded yourself; you have to calm yourself emotionally. Most importantly, you must not come across as being desperate or acting like you cannot live without him: acting this way can really be a relationship killer and will turn off almost any man. Once you are again centered, move on to step 3.

3 - Try showing some harmless attention to another man. Make it subtle, and make sure your boyfriend knows you would never actually cheat on him. You may find this hard to do, especially if you do not have eyes for other men. However, this is a very effective tactic in making your boyfriend straighten up and fly right.

4 - You need to act in a nonchalant way around him - slightly disinterested. If his recent strange behavior comes a bit from trying to play with you or mess with your head, you do not want to fall into that trap. Instead, cheer up and do not show him that his actions are affecting you. While of course you should not lie - you by all means should be true to your feelings - it is also very important not to show him too much drama. Like acting desperate (see Step 3), acting too dramatic in the face of his strange behavior is a sure turn-off for most men.

5 - Continue to keep yourself as physically attractive as possible around him. Ask a girlfriend or trusted co-worker what your best assets are (e.g., hair, certain part of your body, your eyes, etc.) and do everything you can to accentuate that part of your looks. It is likely that your boyfriend is attracted to that part of you, among others. If you let yourself go physically, you are signaling to him that you are out of touch with what turns him on about you. On the other hand, if you strut your stuff (without going over the top), he will know that you know what you got and how to use it. That will turn him on and make him feel even more attracted to you.

These are some insights that have worked for me in getting my boyfriend to stop acting strangely and start taking me more seriously. To be honest, these are not my own, original ideas. Rather, I found some really smart love gurus who shared their hard-won secrets on how to get men to stop playing games and start treating their girlfriends with respect.

Want to get him to fly right and start respecting you again? Learn sure-fire advice from the same love gurus who taught me at: www.in-his-arms-again.com

4 Concepts in Clear Communication Within a Marriage

Has something recently gone wrong in your marriage, causing one or both of you to lose faith slightly? Often, the key to resolving these types of issues is good communication.

The typical scenario many couples face goes something like this: you were both going about your lives and enjoying your relationship, when you started to notice that things between you were not quite the same as they used to be. Communication started to break down and things got off track. Never fear - it is possible to learn good communication skills to improve your marriage and rekindle your love.

Here are 4 concepts in clear communication within a marriage that can help you both dig yourselves out of your communication hole:

1 - Letting Go of the Need to be Right

Start by asking yourself these four questions:

- Are the issues that led to your communication breakdown really important enough to warrant such a rift in your relationship?

- Are the root causes of your recent problems even worth arguing about?

- By taking the particular stand or position that you have taken regarding these issues, do you really come out ahead in terms of your overall life goals and happiness?

- Could the potential outcome of this underlying issue substantially affect your life plans together in terms of finances, your sex life, your children, your home, or other potentially major aspect of your life?

If you answered “no” to any of these questions, the wisest thing to do at this point may be to drop the issue entirely so that you can both focus on getting to the heart of your communication issues. Many communication issues can be avoided if one or both of you can manage to take a softer stance on the issues that affect you most. Believe it or not, most argument are completely unnecessary and could be overcome if both of you could agree that it is more important to be loved than to be right.

2 - Avoid Playing into What You Think Your Partner Wants

The next key communication concept is that of worrying less about how your spouse is perceiving you or how they expect you to act. It does not make sense to work too hard at trying to be someone you are not. If you do, you will end up wasting your energy and you will not able to keep up your false appearances for long. It is important let go of your concerns about how he or she sees you so that you can just be yourself. You will please your husband or wife the most when you are comfortable in your own skin and are being your true self.

3 - Give Yourself the Space You Need

At times when you are feeling frustrated about your relationship or are feeling disrespected by your mate, it is important to give yourself the space you need. While the importance of doing so may not be immediately obvious, it is an important step in learning how to repair your relationship. Whenever you feel like communication has broken down between you and your spouse, remove yourself from the situation in order to get your bearings. When you feel calmer and more relaxed, you will both be able to work from a position of strength.

4 - Take an Unbiased Approach When Analyzing Your Communication Issues

Once you have cleared your head and found your space, it is time to coolly and calmly analyze your communication issues. Once you and your spouse have had the chance to get some distance from the situation, it is important that you both try to focus on the issues at hand rather than the raw emotion that may be getting in the way of clear communication. Avoid blame words and focus instead on your feelings.

These are just some of the concepts in clear communication within a marriage that I have come across after trying everything from self-help books to therapy to good old trial-and-error. I did not come up with these concepts myself, but I have used them to great success in my relationship. What helped the most was finding some real relationship gurus who have turned fixing communication and rekindling marital love into a true science.

If you have decided to commit yourself to making things work with your spouse, check out these tips from love experts who have helped thousands of others do the same at: www.in-your-arms.again.com

Men’s Dress Gloves 101

If the cold weather convinced you to add a pair of fine dress gloves to your wardrobe, then this article will be perfect for you. Besides discussing different materials for inner and out lining, this article will tell you about glove sizes, how to match your gloves to your outfit, as well as how to care for your fine leather gloves.

What Should a Glove be Made Off?

Gloves are made from an out material and the inner lining. The best outer lining of men’s dress gloves are skins. There are many different types of leathers, and depending on the occasion and preference, some types of leather a better suited than others. The best all-around type of leather for fine dress gloves is pig-skin. To be more exact it is called peccary pigskin. It is the perfect type of leather for gloves for a few reasons. First of all it is a little tougher and more durable that calfskin. Nevertheless, it is just as thin and will mold to your hands like a second skin. In addition peccary pigskin is quite stain resistant.

For more formal occasions, such as black and white tie events, the best suited gloves are made from white kid (young goat) or goatskin. For formal events during the summer fine cotton is also acceptable.

The inner lining on cloves is carefully stitched to the leather before sewing the glove together. Lining is used to provide additional warmth and comfort. With this in mind, choose the lining based on your climate. The best lining for fine dress gloves is cashmere. It is extremely warm, non-itchy, and very breathable.

The Making of a Glove

Besides outer material and inner lining, the way the glove is sown together should be considered. Whether the glove is sown using an inseam stitching (one where the glove is sown inside out) or an outseam stitching (one where you can see the stitches more clearly), depends on your preference in style. Both are common and not an indicator of the quality of craftsmanship. What is important however is how fine the glove is stitched together. The finer the stitching the better the glove will fit. As a good rule of thumb: If you can count the individual stitches on a glove, than forget it as dress glove.

How to Match Gloves

As a general rule of thumb, match the gloves to your outer coat or your shoes. The most common dress glove colors are black, and brown shades resembling cork (light brown), chestnut (medium brown) and mahogany (otherwise known as dark brown).

What is Your Glove Size:

If you don’t know your glove size, than the best advice will be to try a glove on before you buy it. If you are an online shopper or are looking for a present for someone else, than knowing the right size is important.

Gloves are measured using the finer length, as well as the hand width. To find your size, measure your finger length by lining up a measuring tape along the inside of your open hand. Measure the distance from your wrist to the tip of your middle finger. Next, let’s measure your hand width. To do this take the measuring tape and wrap it around the widest t part of your open hand. Then make a fist, holding the measuring take in the center. Now measure the distance around the palm and write down this number.

Chart of US glove sizes:

XS: 6-7 inches (hand width), 6 5/16 (finger measurement

S: 7-8 inches (hand width), 6 3/4 (finger measurement)

M: 8-9 inches (hand width), 7 3/16 (finger measurement)

L: 9-10 inches (hand width), 7 9/16 (finger measurement)

XL: 10-11 inches (hand width), 8 1/16 (finger measurement)

Beside US sizes, gloves are, just like shoes, measured in European sizes. To find your European glove size is quite simple. European gloves sizes are numbered from 6 to 11, with 6 being the XS and 11 being the XXL size. Just like in the US, finger length and hand width are used to determine glove sizes. Instead of inches, millimeters are used.

How to Care For Fine Leather Gloves

Fine leather gloves should never be machine washed. Check the label inside the glove for care instructions. Gloves should only be washed when absolutely necessary, and it is recommended to give them to a dry-cleaner specializing in treatment and cleaning of leather.

To protect your gloves, occasionally spray them with a water repellent spray. Using paste or cream polishes and conditioner will keep leather soft, supple, and moisturized. This keeps the leather from cracking. Some of the conditioners are also known as balms.

Pohl is the owner and fonder of Ties-Necktie.com. When not working for is necktie business, he enjoys writing articles related to men’s fashion and his industry. He himself has a passion for wearing fine neckties, which motivated him to open his own necktie and bow tie retailer in 2007. At Ties-Necktie you will find anything from classic striped neckties to more formal solid color ties.

Scale Engines

Puzzle and construction toys are the best kind of toys that you can get for your toddler. By using a few guidelines in purchasing them, you can open your child’s mind and creativity as well as giving him or her a very fun playtime.

Blocks are great for building small motor skills but be sure to get the type that are interlocking, that is, the large knobs on top of the block fit into the holes in the bottom of the next block. These blocks take just enough skill to challenge a child but not so much as to defeat him. The sense of accomplishment a child gets from fitting these blocks together will build her confidence and encourage her to try more elaborate structure. Be sure that the blocks are too large to be swallowed or even placed in the mouth.

Another type of block that will bring fun as well as advancement are the foam blocks that your toddler can play with in the bathtub. Once wet, these blocks stick to the bathroom walls and the child can make an easily removable mural while he soaks. You will, of course, be there with him and can make suggestions or talk with him about what he is building in the water or on the wall. Bathtub foam toys are also available in different shapes such as sailboats, people, animals and other entertaining forms. (Never leave a child under five alone in the bathtub even for a second, even to retrieve more toys or to answer the phone.)

Puzzles are another great way to have fun and learn simultaneously. Your child may not be able to put the pieces together correctly right away but if the puzzle pieces are brightly colored and varied shapes, it will be fun for him to arrange them different ways. She will have a lot of fun with the puzzles that have an animal, person, or vehicle completely on each piece. Some children continue to play with their puzzles long after they’ve mastered them just to have fun with the pieces that depict those things. Be sure that the puzzle pieces are large enough that they cannot be put in the mouth and swallowed.

Always try to play with your children instead of sitting them down with their toys and then doing something else yourself. Your time with them at this point in their lives will make an indelible impression and give them security as well as confidence. The bonds built as you play with your child, even for a few minutes, are indestructible and will have a positive influence on the rest of their lives.

A very good place to start shopping for toddler’s toys is www.enginescale.com, which also has a variety of helpful articles and suggestions.

Please be sure that any paint or materials on your child’s toys do not contain lead, melamine or other harmful ingredients. And above all, have fun with your child!

For more information on ship scale, visit http://www.shipscale.com and http://www.enginescale.com.

Classic Pieces That Never Go Out of Style

Fashion always changes and it’s very hard to keep up with it. You just bought a new pair of skinny jeans and the next thing you know, skinny jeans is out. That is the way with fashion and sometimes, we just end up going with the flow – or more like drowning in it.

So instead, try to go for classic pieces that never go out of style. These fashion pieces really give you the most bang for your buck and you could never go wrong with them.

Classic Pieces You Must Have

The Little Black Dress

It has been said time and time again that the little black dress is something every girl should have. One can never go wrong with black and if you find a dress with a cut that suits your body type, then you know that it is a keeper. Black never goes out of style and the only thing that changes is the fabric. Stay with more neutral fabrics like satin or with a little bit of lace and try to keep away from velvet and other materials for they are seasonal and could easily be out of fashion. It is also easy to dress up or dress down a black dress. Wear a bright colored sweater or belt to add more fun to it or a nice sheer or soft shawl to add more drama and a little hint of romance.

The White Button Down Shirt

No matter the trend, white is a classic and a white button down shirt is a must-have. You can wear this casually with jeans or dress it up with tailored pants. You can choose to wear it over tank tops and keep it partially open. You can even wear a belt to cinch your waist and it would completely look modern and fun.

Black Skirt

You might think of black pencil skirts as boring but they really should be a staple in every girl’s closet. The black pencil skirt, preferably knee-length, is one of the most important pieces of clothing that you must have particularly at work. You might think it’s dull but paired with a nice fitting black blouse and killer heels, add a little dash of color like a skinny belt, and you will see that that outfit can always turn heads. Simple does not necessarily mean boring.

Black Slacks

Black slacks are your alternative to a black pencil skirt and are probably one of the most versatile pieces of clothing you can own. You can dress up black slacks on an evening out, you can wear it to work and you can even wear it to a funeral and it wouldn’t look out of place. Just make sure that you pick a neutral fabric because materials like corduroy or linen are easily phased out and depends more on what’s ‘au currant’.

Classic pieces are practical for they are not dictated by fashion which tends to be very fleeting and always changing. You can never go wrong with these classic pieces and in fact, you can even consider them as fool-proof. If you want to experiment more, then try building your closet from these classic pieces.

Benedict recommends Queens Leather for some great fashion accessories such as leather laptop cases and luggage

Between Fad and Fashion: Know the Difference

Fashion is always changing and you sometimes end up not being able to catch up with it. How many times have you bought a new outfit and ended up just wearing it once because it was no longer in fashion? Were there times that you bought a lot of stuff that ended up at the back of your closet, never to see daylight again? Don’t you just cringe when you remember what you wore it once just because it was the “trend”?

With the way fashion changes in an instant, it becomes really difficult to distinguish which is fad and which is true fashion. You most probably end up buying tons of stuff that you never get to wear the next year or worse, the next week, and thus, were not worth the money that you paid for them. Here are some tips to help you all along.

Know the Trend, Know Yourself

It is actually very easy to know what the next trend is going to be. You get a hint of this when you watch popular television shows and observe famous actors and actresses. Celebrities are usually the ones who promotes a new trend and if you don’t really like gossiping about their lives, then think that this is one way of finding out what the next fashion is going to be.

Finding what’s popular now is actually very easy. You will see images in magazines, designs copied in stores and the most telling part is when somebody you know is wearing them. The important question to ask yourself is, “Can I wear them?” and “Will I have the opportunity to wear it?”

Don’t just buy something because it is the new trend without being sure yourself that you can wear it. Don’t just stash it in the far corners of your closet thinking that you could probably put it to good use someday. There is really no point in buying something that you are not sure you could wear.

Keep Up with Fashion, Ignore the Fad

It is very tempting to buy the latest skinny jeans or indulge in a pair of espadrilles but you should stock up on the basics and classic pieces first. Classic pieces like the little black dress, black slacks, white button down shirt, jeans and a black pencil skirt are fashion pieces that never go out of style.

For example, leopard prints are the latest trend and you want to try the look out. Instead of buying every article of clothing that has a leopard print in it, why not buy a few accessory pieces or two just to satisfy your curiosity and give you that updated, new fashion look? You can buy headbands with leopard prints or pumps with leopard prints and pair those up with classic pieces like a pair of jeans and a white button down shirt.

Don’t get caught up in fashion to the point that you don’t get to decide yourself if you look good or not. Know yourself, know your body and decide to wear what you like and what looks great. Sometimes, fashion is just all about common sense.

Benedict recommends Queens Leather for some great fashion accessories such as leather laptop cases and luggage

Eye Fashion: Seeing the World With New Eyes

The eyes are the windows to your soul so it basically makes sense to make sure that you give the world the best view possible. The eyes have always been a key point in fashion and why shouldn’t it be? A person’s clothes and outer appearance has the ability to attract attention but it’s always the eyes that make you stare and want to get to know the person more.

With the eyes playing such an important part in one’s beauty, it then makes sense that a lot of effort is being put into ‘beautifying’ your eyes. Here are a few tips that you could use to give your eyes that extra glow.

Simple Tips That You Can Do At Home

Tired, droopy eyes are always a no-no and you can do something really simple to brighten your eyes. Don’t be fooled by the usual cucumber trick – cucumbers have a soothing effect on eyes that does not really last. You can achieve the same effect, even better, by popping a spoon into the fridge for a couple of minutes. Then place the spoon on your eye, making sure that you do not press deeply. Eyes are sensitive and the skin around them is prone to wrinkles so make sure that you handle your eyes cautiously. For a minute or two, just relax and let the cool spoon soothe your tired eyes and – voila – perky, expressive eyes in an instant.

You could also look for eye mask with gels in them. The concept is basically the same, just place the mask inside the fridge and once it’s cool enough, you can wear it and let it soothe tired, red eyes. This also helps you eliminate eye bags and those dark under eye circles. Of course, nothing beats sleep so make sure that you also get proper sleep.

Popular Eye Fashion

You don’t have to settle with just boring eye shadows anymore. You can use a variety of things to basically ‘dress up’ your eyes. From wearing false eyelashes, having your eyebrows tattoed or wearing contact lenses, there are so many options that you can choose from.

False eyelashes are popular these days and have been made to suit your needs. You can wear something that looks as natural and believable as normal eyelashes or you could choose to wear false eyelashes in more interesting ways. There are colored eyelashes, eyelashes with gems and stones in them and fake eyelashes in varying lengths and texture. It is very easy to wear false eyelashes now these days and with so many options to choose from, it is very easy to play around with them and see what suits you and your mood best.

Now you can also play around with your eye color. Keep people guessing about your true eye color and even surprise them with a few interesting colored contacts. Colored contact lenses that are safe for everyday use are popular these days. Just make sure that you take proper good care of them so you prevent any eye infections as well as make sure that these contact lenses last you a long time. If you are looking for something new in your look, wearing contact lenses might just be your answer.

So go ahead, view the world in a different way now.

Benedict recommends Queens Leather for some great fashion accessories such as leather laptop cases and luggage

From Plain to Pretty in an Instant

Are there times when you just want to wear something comfortable and not have to worry whether you look fashionable or not? If you are in this stump, then don’t worry for you are not alone. Many women just find themselves in a fashion rut and getting out of it is really tiring.

Give yourself a break – you don’t always have to become a slave to fashion. Fashion is not always like choosing between what’s comfortable and what looks good. You can find a balance between the two and hopefully, these few quick ‘glam up’ items will help you when you lose fashion inspiration.

Quick ‘Glam Up’ Pieces You Must Have

Eyeglasses are the rave these days. It can turn your plain clothes and outfit into something that’s effortlessly cool. Wear your favorite pair of sunglasses and strut out like your favorite model or wear simple eyeglasses and be your preppy self. Wearing eyeglasses is definitely one way that you can update your look without much trouble or hassle. Plus, it is the perfect answer if you didn’t have enough sleep and your eyes are covered with big dark circles.

Hats come in a variety of ways and are godsend if you are suffering from bad hair days. Sometimes, you just don’t have the time to make a perfect updo and a cute hat might be your lifesaver. Of course, it could become obvious that you are hiding your bad hair day so don’t wear hats if you are going to be staying indoors most of the time. This ‘trick’ is only acceptable if you are outdoors and would need a hat.

If you still don’t have the time to style your hair or is just too lazy to deal with it, then a hair band is perfect for you. Hair bands are in fashion these days and just a simple, modern headband could give you the “nonstop-hair-styling” reprieve that you are looking for.

Bags are also perfect for they are not only functional, they are also fashionable. Even if you are just wearing a pair of jeans and white shirt, you can update that look by using a fashionable big bag. Consider your bag as a form of accessory that you wear to make a simple, plain outfit look well-thought off and pulled-together. Pair it with comfortable flats in a color that compliments your bag and you are good to go.

You can also wear a belt to make your outfit look more fashionable. Try wearing a big belt a little above your waist when you are wearing a dress to clinch your waist and give you more of a curve. You could wear skinny belts with jeans or skirts. Belts are in fashion today and you can play around with belts if you want color and style to your plain and simple outfit.

Those are just a few tricks that you can use to make a simple outfit look fashionable in an instant.

Benedict recommends Queens Leather for some great fashion accessories such as leather laptop cases and luggage

Increase Your Pregnancy Chances By Living A Balanced Lifestyle

Balanced Lifestyle

You can increase your pregnancy chances by living a “balanced lifestyle”. This means you will need to eliminate stress, overeating, substance abuse, sleep deprivation and couch potato, to name a few, from your lifestyle vocabulary.

Weight

It has been shown that 12 percent of all infertility cases include women weighing either too much or not enough. It is best to get your weight to a normal amount for your height before trying to become pregnant. However, make sure to do it in a healthy, responsible way rather than a crash diet of sorts. Try to eat a balanced diet without stuffing yourself at every meal and stay away from a lot of sweets.

Exercise

Unless you are already in an established exercise routine (non-excessive), 20-30 minutes daily of moderate exercise is recommended.

Sleep

Sleep is essential to our quality of life, overall health, and fertility. Sleep helps heal and regenerate the brain and body. When a woman suffers from lack of sleep so does her mood, her immunity, her relationship with her spouse, and hormonal balance. Lack of sleep can also lead to fertility-impairing habits like too much caffeine and overeating. Lack of sleep can also lead to irregular menstruating, which can also postpone conceiving.

Drugs

There are drugs that can actually decrease your fertility. If you are taking any of the following, either stop, or talk with your doctor about it.

Antibiotics

Antidepressants

Chemotherapy

Hormones

Ibuprofen

Prescription pain medications

Other Substances

Some other substances you will want to eliminate, or at the very least, decrease your intake of:

Caffeine: Studies show that under 3 cups per day does not appear to hurt your chances of becoming pregnant. If you are a heavy coffee drinker, cut down to under 3.

Alcohol: One study showed that consuming less than five glasses of wine per week increased chances of pregnancy compared to those who drank more than that.

Tobacco: Smoking has many disadvantages in achieving a pregnancy. Cigarette smoking is the cause of about 13 percent of infertility. It can also bring on early menopause in women, cause lower sperm counts in men, and also affect the sperm condition.

STDs

These are some sexual transmitted diseases that can possibly cause infertility:

Cervicitis

Chlamydia

Gonorrhea

Herpes – not alone

Genital Warts – not alone

Nongonococcal urethritis

Pelvic inflammatory disease

Syphilis

Stress

Chronic stress can interfere with fertility. In more extreme cases, stress could interfere with hormone production or block ovulation altogether. It can affect the immune system which could prevent embryo implantation. Stress can also prevent a woman from sustaining a pregnancy.

Vitamin Supplements: These are some vitamins that may increase fertility:

Lycopene: The All India Institute of Medical Sciences recently did a study and found that lycopene, which is an antioxidant, can increase sperm concentrations in men who are infertile. Lycopene can be found in apricots, papaya, pink grapefruit, watermelon and tomatoes.

Folic Acid: Researchers say that women who take this B-Complex vitamin every day have a better chance of getting pregnant.

Vitamin E: Very powerful antioxidant which could increase men and women’s fertility.

Selenium: Can prevent chromosome breakage which causes miscarriage and birth defects, and also low sperm production.

L-arginine: Amino acid can aid in sperm production and quality.

Ornithine: Amino acid also used in addition to L-arginine to aid in sperm production and quality.

L-carnitine: Amino acid may help sperm cells to function normally.

Zinc: Mineral that helps with semen and testosterone production.

Coenzyme Q10: Antioxidant if taken daily can improve sperm movement in men.

Essential fatty acids: Taken by men with poor sperm quality, motility or low counts.

Whether you want a pregnancy or not, it would be of great benefit to your health and well-being to try to live as balanced a lifestyle as you can. You will feel better about yourself and the rewards will be worth it in the long run.

DLDowney is an entrepreneur in internet website creation and marketing with previous experience in graphic arts. Pregnancy…or Not

Writing a Resume - Think Like a Turkey?

I once asked an old hunter what his secret was for bagging the elusive wild turkey. He told me, first you have to think like a turkey. You have to understand that turkeys like the company of other turkeys, they seek security in brush, and they’ll gamble with that security for a shot at food or a mate. Think like a turkey, prepare your hunt accordingly, and bag the prize. Ahhh.

Years later, someone asked me how to win a job with a prime employer. I told him, first you have to think like the hiring official. You have to understand that the hiring official is likely doing an onerous task - sifting through piles of like-sounding resumes looking for a gem. The hiring official understands profits and losses. He understands the direction the company is moving in. Ideally, he wants to find a candidate who understands all those things, too. Why? Because that candidate will make him look good to his superiors; business grows, he keeps his job, maybe gets a raise. Think like a hiring official, prepare your hunt accordingly, and bag the prize.

It’s funny how everything in life is a lesson - if we’re in the mood to learn.

First Impressions - Bad

Because your resume objective is the first thing the hiring official will read, he’ll be using that opportunity to quickly size you up. Let’s pretend for a moment that your resume objective reads like this… Seeking a challenging position offering competitive compensation, limited travel, and advancement opportunities to senior management. Well, you’ve just written your own personal fairy tale. Not only have you failed to think like a hiring official, but that hiring official will actually be using his wingtip shoe to compress your resume to the bottom of his trash can while uttering expletives that will clear the reception area of every last salesman.

First Impressions - Good

Let’s try another example. This time, let’s pretend you’ve done some research on the company in question. And that you’ve honestly appraised your own skills and identified those that would be most valued by this company. And that you’ve determined that personal fairy tales don’t keep a company in business - profits do. Now, your resume objective reads like this… Entry-level position in Finance which could fully utilize a technical expertise in database design and strong drive to maximize corporate profitability in a competitive global marketplace.

Wow. In a single sentence you’ve drawn a straight line between a key ingredient of the job position and your skill set, acknowledged the company’s bid to go global, and signaled your understanding that profits are key to everybody keeping their job–including (and most importantly) the person reading your resume.

Home Free?

If jobs were handed out on nothing more than resume objectives, you’d be dry cleaning your suit for the Monday morning office tour. But of course, there’s more to the hiring process than just writing a killer resume objective. The important thing is that you’ve put yourself in the game. There are other critical elements of the resume, to be sure, and the door can still slam shut for a number of reasons. But you’ve made it over the first hurdle in the screening process.

You’re cocked and loaded. And there’s a big bird in sight.

Need a bit more help with that resume? Former recruiter David Alan Carter evaluates and ranks the web’s most popular online resume builders, as well as affordable professional resume writers, at the website http://www.bestresumeservices.org/

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